Is it any wonder I have to physically restrain myself from taking a bite of of her cheeks? I am so blessed.

Janine tagged me with this little meme, so here goes.

10 Things I've Never Done
1. Understood why golf is so exciting to some people.
2. Thrown up Chinese food, although I've been told it is a pretty horrible experience.
3. I've never been dumped.
4. Been able to look at a sunflower without feeling homesick for the fields in North Dakota.
5. Baked a loaf of bread successfully. It's always doughy in the middle with a stone crust. This is the one "homemaker" skill that I just can't do. Too bad, since I love fresh baked bread.
6. Thought I was good enough. I've thought I was good, but never good enough.
7. Passed an algebra class. I failed twice, with effort. Sad, but true. Remedial math and honors everything else. I'm weird like that.
8. Bungee jumped. It looks like a good way to give myself whiplash.
9. Screamed at an incompetant clerk in a store, although I've wanted to.
10. Finished watching Arsenic and Old Lace. Every time I rent it I fall asleep or get too busy to watch it before I return it. I've made it half way through at least three times.

I made Maggie a dress last week. Once again, no pattern. I eyeballed it, as usual. I did check out some patterns at the craft store, but at the prices they were asking I just didn't see how that was supposed to make sewing economical. Anyway, here it is, a dress of my own design, modeled by the lovely Margaret.

Jonas’ party was a huge success! Everything went well; the worst thing that happened was a spilled pitcher of invisible kool-aide. The kids behaved, shared remarkably well, and no one freaked out at gift time. I ran in circles for the first half an hour before I realized that everything was going splendidly and I really didn’t need to do anything. It was almost surreal.

We had fourteen of the kids show up, so it was a busy backyard, but with the pools, the bounce castle, and the food they were totally entertained. I ended up scrapping the bean bag toss and just handed the bean bags out to the kids to play with. They also loved the bouncy balls.

Jonas got some fun gifts. His favorites are definitely the Buzz Lightyear Rocket Tent from my in-laws and the train set from us. Last night we got a sitter and went out and when we came home we found Jonas fast asleep in his tent. When he woke up this morning he saw his train set and freaked out as if it were the first time he saw it! He spent at least three hours yesterday playing with it. I wonder if he thought it was just a dream?


Birthday Candles and Opening Gifts, You've got to love that look of total delight that comes with each present.

The Big Train Set with Cranky the Crane that was Begged for for Almost Six Months and The Bounce House

My Super-Cool Cupcakes and Check Out The Ham Hocks on that Baby!

I can see why though, those dumb paparazzi keep overexposing the kid's ears. I mean, c'mon, I'd be ticked off too.

Now for my big confession. When I woke up the morning of the party I was absolutely horrified to find a huge trail of ants marching up the side of the fridge to the platter of cupcakes. The platter wasn’t exactly crawling with them, but there were quite a few. I spent almost forty-five minutes removing the creepy crawly cupcake climbers as meticulously as I could. I really hope no one ate an ant. Needless to say, very few of my friends were informed of this.

Jonas’ birthday party is tomorrow. His real birthday isn't until later this month, but my sister decided to have her wedding reception that day. I don't mind, he's turning three. He has no clue when his birthday is; it could be next Christmas and he'd be tickled to have a party. Anyway, I have gone a bit overboard, and I’m feeling a wee bit drained. I have been doing so much this week (for the party and other stuff) that the life is all but sucked out of me. Jonas was on one today and caused me to cry out of sheer frustration. He is a lot of work. Some days I just don’t have what it takes to be his mama. It's one of those days.

I have high hopes for his party, but do understand that I have a special needs child who is going to be not only thrilled to death with his big Incredibles bash, but probably have a few moments of not so stellar behavior. I am hoping that if I pawn the Magster off on my awesome mother in-law, have Chris trail the birthday boy, and take care of the rest (food, games, prizes) we might have a chance. At least he shouldn't freak out at present time like he usually does at birthdays- this time they're all for him.

Jonas picked out the Incredibles theme. He is my little Dash. My in laws gave him Dash pajamas last weekend and he has worn them everyday this week, all day long. I have had to wash them seperately because he must be attired in Dash-wear at all times. Earlier today he was wearing Dash shirt, Dash pants and Dash undies. When I want him to go somewhere I tell him to be Dash and run! Sometimes it works and sometimes it backfires dreadfully. I wish I were Elastigirl so I could reach all the way down the block and (smack him upside the head)- lovingly bring him back. Life’s not fair though, is it?

To entertain the sixteen children who will be attending (yes I just wrote sixteen, that was not a typo and yes, I realize I am certifiably insane, but, by golly, I will make this work!) I have 2 wading pools, once bounce castle, one sprinkler, and I spent hours sewing beanbags from Incredibles material to do a bean bag toss. (Actually, they aren’t filled with beans, beans are a choking hazard- I used rice. . .then I ran out of rice and tried to use minute rice, which interestingly enough, doesn’t work. At that point I used lentils, which worked.) Since we are talking about two and three year olds I made 3 shapes to lay on the ground and the kids just have to match the square bean bag (Rice bag? Lentil bag? Just doesn’t have the same ring to it does it?) to the square shape and the circle and triangle bean bag to their respective shapes. In fact- I don’t even care if they get it right- they will still get a cute little fringe edged bean bag to take home as a prize.

They will also be getting bouncy balls just for kicks and giggles. Gotta have party favors right? Well, I priced the bouncy balls at a few stores and couldn’t believe that most places wanted about 75 cents per tiny little choking hazard sized ball. Then I stumbled across a huge quarter machine at Old Navy filled with jumbo sized (read: non-choking hazard. . .I really sound like I worry about the choking thing don’t I?) bouncy balls. At a quarter a pop, I couldn’t beat the price. Of course, I had to show up on two different occasions with a fistful of quarters and stand there cranking the machine like a five year old. (I didn’t get enough the first trip- amazingly, I can invite twenty kids to playgroup and only four show up- I invite the same twenty to a birthday party and almost everyone makes it. . .perhaps I should write “free cake and bring me a present” on the playgroup invites, no?)

I made really great cupcakes today. Well, the second go round at the cupcakes was great. The first round Jonas was causing so much trouble that I got distracted and put in 2 cups of oil when I needed two cups of water. I watched the glistening gloop mixing in the Kitchen Aide for about five minutes before I realized my error. I had to make an emergency run to the commissary to buy more cake stuff. Anyway, I frosted them, then stuck a Swoop (new chocolate candies that look like little chocolate Pringles, but taste like the classic favs) halfway in, then stuck a vellum Incredibles character sticker to the swoop. These cup cakes are action packed, people! We will also be having apple cupcakes. I have to make those in the morning or they will be all brown and nastified by tomorrow. You just cut the apple in half, spread peanut butter on top and decorate. Mine will have goldfish swimming in the peanut butter with little raisins. I saw the idea in a Martha Stewart kids magazine (she may be a crook, but the woman has cute ideas!)

I cannot wait to give Jonas his new train set. I had a rummage sale just so I could afford to get him the set for his birthday, and miraculously made twenty-five cents short of the price of the set. He is going to be so stoked.

Anyway. I need to get some sleep. Tomorrow is going to be intense. I am also closing a Stampin’ Up party I had. If anyone needs some stamps drop me an e-mail, I’ll hook you up.

Yesterday I was waiting to have some material cut for me at Joann’s Fabrics when I spotted a box of discount remnant fabrics. Since they are usually discounted pretty significantly I thought I’d take a peek. Right on top was a bright red material covered in red sequins. It took everything in me not to buy the quarter yard of red sequin material for nostalgia’s sake. You see, back in the day, I used to love to wear red sequins.

Little known fact to most of my blog readership (hee hee- I have a “readership”. That sounds so important.) Is that I used to put on the sequins and go sing and dance for people a few times a month. I know you’re thinking, oh my gosh! She’s an ex-stripper! Sorry, nothing that exciting.

I was in my high school show choir, Pizzazz. We were one of the good show choirs, not the lame ones that just sing off key and hardly move. We danced and we sang well enough to take first place and overall best in show in every competition we entered while I was a member. We did shows for school stuff, of course, but we also did company parties and concerts. We helped open a K-Mart once ( I know, I know, biiig time stuff, eh?) We did a television show for public broadcasting too. During the holiday season I was in a different hotel conference center every night singing for company Christmas parties. Valentine’s we did singing telegrams. One Easter we sang on a cruise ship in the Bahamas.

As completely hokey as all of this sounds, I really loved every minute of it. Here’s a publicity shot from my junior year.

I couldn’t find the shot I wanted to share. It’s not like I leave this stuff out or anything. I really only think about it when I stumble across red sequins at the fabric store. Since having children, I sometimes feel like I have a past life, because the past is so far removed.

Jonas has discovered that he can make Maggie cry by roaring at her. Jonas has been roaring at people for the better part of his three years, so getting him to stop for her sake is proving quite the task. Poor Baby!

This photo is actually from a few days ago- I feel bad taking a picture of Maggie when she is so scared by the roaring!